The reason I say not with all my soul, because I think my soul is a holy sanctuary where only God is invited. My soul is the inner core of who I am, my inner most thoughts and feelings are in my soul. My soul is the place I meditate on when I invite God in, to show me my faults and help me see where I might be going wrong and disappointing Him. My soul is the place where God keeps me whole, where He loves me and has created me just the way I am.
If I allow someone into my soul, no one is perfect and they will more than likely hurt and disappoint me, they may cause me to struggle with my relationship with God. My insecurities and fear may cause me to hold back and stop communicating with Him especially if my life isn't right with the other person.
My soul is a space in my heart which has a beautiful bright white light... His light that shines with in me. It is the place where I can leave the world outside and be quiet and listen... to what I am thinking and feeling and what He is saying to me. I cannot be distracted with more than two of us in that Holy space. My soul is my essence.
When I have allowed people into that space they have come in with all their imperfections and I have lost my peace and serenity, I become confused about what they speak into my life and what He wants me to hear. My soul is where I am at my most vulnerable, where my inside shows on the outside. Since the garden of Eden my soul is covered over with His love.
If you would like to read a preview of my book you will be able to read the first 60 pages on this link. When we are in an abusive relationship our soul is being violated so badly that the abuser takes up the space where only God should be.
I have found comfort in some verses from the book of Isaiah chapter 54:verses 5 and 6. I would not wish any woman to go through any form of abuse. I have become a stronger woman because of emotional, mental, verbal, and spiritual abuse and have become closer to the Lord because of it, He is my strength and my song. All of the abuses I mentioned are just as bad as physical abuse which usually goes hand in hand. Men think they can get away with those abuses, but 'mental cruelty' is just as destroying as physical abuse. 'God is my refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble'.
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