Monday, September 29, 2014

The book I wrote in 2007 is still available. Please buy a copy and stand firm on ABUSE IS NO EXCUSE. Often people say to me, 'you need to move on with your life', well the truth is I have moved on, but one can never forget, being raped, sexually abused, beaten over and over again through ones life. One just tries to live the best we can. I chose to write a book, do public speaking and work with other victims but that is not right for everyone.

Recovery from PTSD

Painting Cats - Fight, Flight, Freeze, Submit, Attach.

FOR those of you who visit or have been following this blog for some time, I see a Dr. Annemarie Norvello who specialises in TRAUMA.  I have SUFFERED with CPTSD for a hundred years, well that's what it feels like anyway.
The response as we know to extreme stress is FIGHT, FLIGHT, FREEZE, SUBMIT, ATTACH.
Dr. Annemarie absolutely loves cats which is why I decided to do these paintings for her.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Oscar Pistorius

At the outset let me say that I am not accusing OP of domestic violence even though there have been reports of his abusive behaviour with women. But watching the trial and listening to the psychiatrist diagnosing his General Anxiety Disorder makes me think that most men who abuse women must suffer from the same condition. The reason I say this is because most men who abuse women have had some trauma in their childhood. The response to extreme anxiety is Fight, Flight, Freeze, Submit or Attach. By nature women would be more inclined to flight under threat where as with men it is perhaps more probable that they would fight under threat.
No matter what one has been through in childhood we all have to learn to cope and make the best of bad situations and therefore there is never any reason that anyone should resort to violence unless our lives are being threatened.
Let me remind anyone who might be reading this.... that the prisons world wide are full of women who have been abused and who have resorted to fitting back and have killed their partners therefore the same amount of violent men who have abused women should be sitting behind bars. The rules apply to both.

Thursday, April 17, 2014


It has been a long while since I have been blogging on all my blog sites. My computer crashed and what a mission to get things back on track. This isn't even really that safe for me as I haven't been able to sort out the problems and who knows when this computer will go on the blink again. But for now lets just hold out that things will be alright.

A lot has been going on in my personal life and maybe soon I will be able to share some of that with my readers but for now I just want to talk about the Oscar Pistorius Trial. Much to the frustration of many I still am not able to form an opinion about Oscar. I am just not a person who likes to judge people at the best of times let alone when it comes to something as serious as this case. I am happy to sit back and wait for the outcome before voicing my opinion.

I don't like what happened, my heart breaks for Reeva's family and I do want to see that justice is carried out in accordance with the law. But with a background like mine I tend to think deeply about why women stay in abusive relationships beyond the obvious and why do men treat women so badly. I don't think I will ever have the answers. All I care about is that women will be educated, seek counselling when they need it, search their own hearts as to why they choose abusive men and then move on with healthy partners and hopefully find happiness. It has taken be a life time, because 'in my day' we honestly didn't have the resources available to young women today.

So with that being said I hope people will continue to read my book, scroll down for the link, and perhaps find something to relate to and make some decisions for their own lives. After all that was my intention from the very beginning.  Read my story.. could this be you?