My daughter shared this photo on Facebook this morning which I thought was beautiful. When I saw this photo I had two thoughts.
1. Translates to me as someone bursting with JOY.
2. Anger building up that it blows your own head off.
3. Anger building inside of us and being transformed into love that flies out of us into the world and the people around us.
It is all about interpretation. Throughout the year I receive dozens of emails asking for help. Each and every email explains sometimes in great detail what their partner has done and is till doing. I did that too for many years. NOTHING is going to change his behaviour, or hers but you CAN do something about yours.
How long will we weep and curl up into a ball as a victim?
Last night I was watching a program on TV called 'Scared Straight'. Rebellious teenagers being taken into prisons to be shown what prison life is like if they don't make some serious changes.
Towards the end of the program the teenagers all stood in a line and going down the line they were asked a similar question "why do you do the things you do?"
Going down the line these were some of the responses.
My mother is a heroin addict.
My mother doesn't understand me.
My mother's boyfriend screams at me all the time.
My mother doesn't care what I do.
My mother, my mother, my mother ! Not once did I hear any of these girls speak about their fathers!
More than likely these mothers themselves grew up being abandoned, abused, neglected with addictive parents! But all these girls wanted was a normal loving healthy MOTHER.
We as mothers have a huge responsibility to make the right choices, to do what ever it takes to protect our children. I have had huge struggles with two of my daughters and no amount of me thinking... I WISH THEY UNDERSTOOD how hard life has been for me, has helped.
I have had a very hard life and if you are in an abusive relationship, you more than likely have had it hard too.
Look in the mirror and deal with your past. Forgive those who need your forgiveness, don't allow the anger and pain to build up inside of you. BELIEVE that you are worth more, you count, you are precious in God's sight and you can be what ever you choose to be.
Talk to your children especially if they are teenagers. Tell them you are sorry you have messed up and will do what ever it takes to turn things around. Be a mother that your children can respect and trust.
I made huge mistakes other than just being a victim, but I will talk about that tomorrow.
Choose to be happy one day at a time.